Confessions by Numbers: The Past 3 Weeks

Number of times I pretended to be on my cell phone: 4

Number of those times in order to avoid talking to someone: 3

... in order to look busy and potentially popular: 1

Number of times I gave a classmate a fake project to work on because I was bitter I had to be there working but didn't trust him/her to do anything real: 1

Number of times I did something rather ridiculous just to see if I could get away with it: 1

Number of times I asked for a refund or reduced bill because of dissatisfaction: 1

Number of bland and/or gross tomato-based seafood dishes I glumly consumed: 2